…but the one who made a lasting impression.

It was early 2006, I remember because that previous year around the end of may Pretty Ricky’s first album “Blue Stars” came out and I had just met my homegirl Katelynn because of them.  It was nothing out of the ordinary for us girls at the time. Michelle, Katelynn and I were going to chill at our homeboy Andre’s house. Andre had a thing for Katelynn and he used to call her his “snow bunnie” which made me giggle at the time. I was too stupid back then to realize the only reason he was enthralled with her was because she’s as white as fresh snow,a true ginger kid, a girl that a hood dude rarely came across but I digress, this story isn’t about them.

Katelynn and Andre had went off into lala land someplace and I was chilling in his living room with Michelle who was watching the first Flavor of Love (yuck) and Andre’s cousin. My memory is usually dead on but for the life of me I cant remember Andre’s cousin’s name. I guess that’s what makes this memory even more special, the anonymous vibes that it gives. I sorta remember that this cousin of Andre’s was cute. Fine even. It amazed me that this was Andre’s real cousin because he was caramel and had some height to him, whereas Andre is short and deep chocolate skinned — not that that’s a bad thing of course, being chocolate skinned .. not short.

One thing led to another and this cousin and I started talking. In the beginning my mind was on how I can make him mine. I knew nothing about him other then the fact that he was cute, my age, my  homeboy’s cousin, and that he went to Rice HS. I loved boys that went to Rice, something about that all boys Catholic HS in Harlem was a HUGE turn on for me back then.  I wanted him from what I saw on the outside. However, as the conversation got deeper I was more interested in what he had to say then thinking about getting with him.We spoke of relationship issues, a woman/man’s role in society, funny things, and a whole lot more. In the end we told each other how nice it was to have such a fulfilling conversation and left it at that. By that time the moans from the bedroom were gone and I knew it was about to be time to roll on up out of Andre’s crib.

Was he feeling me after all of that? Who knows. Was I feeling me after all of that? Hell yeah.

For the first time in my 17 years of life I talked to a guy on an intellectual level instead of a sexual one and found out the true meaning of attraction. I was attracted to his words and was yearning to learn more about what was in his head then what was in his pants. I didn’t have to flash my tongue ring at him, i didn’t have to talk like i was raised in a back ally someplace so he would take interest in me. I finally found out that what was on the inside mattered more then what was on the outside.

Its true that we didn’t as much as exchange numbers so I have no clue on how he felt about me, as a matter of fact I never spoke to or saw him again. However, our conversation was not in vain for that very summer I met a guy who had the same conversational effect on me.I knew this time that I should pursue this guy who stimulated my intellect.

… three years and a baby we are still going strong.

“Men who can’t deal with a woman with her own mind are cowardly, poor wastes of testosterone. It’s sad that the only way you can feel like you’re strong is to mingle with weak people. If you’re a real man you’ll be strong, or better yet stronger with a strong woman.” – E. Shaw